Why I've decided that, after a year of disliking my stupid uncontrolable brain, I actually enjoy what it does:

Two parallel dreams, one directly after the other. For both dreams, it's as if the watcher of images is separate (even if the characters in the dream are me):

1. A series of doorways, thresholds, in a linear row, one after another after another on a white empty infinite background. I walk through these doorways, and the space between each doorway is at first a few feet and then increasingly less. Each time I walk through a doorway, I feel something change. I come out knowing something new, or feeling physically different, or understanding an emotion, etc. As the doorways get closer together, the watcher just gets flashes of change in between opaque thresholds, and because these flashes occur more frequently due to more frequent doorways, the changes grow and the motion speeds up and speeds up and speeds up.

2. Just my body against a white empty infinite background. But then the watcher's vision changes, like gaining a kind of extra radar. And what this radar shows is my body both solid and hollow... as if the ribs form an arched doorway or threshold from what's behind me to what's ahead of me. And through this threshold comes a steady stream--pulled through me as if an intense and undeniable gravity forms, vacuums the stream in, and then propels it out and forward. This stream coming through me is composed of infinite vertical and horizontal planes that curve in towards my spine and then curve out through my ribcage. That is, all of infinite time and space incurves through the singularity of a passage through my body and then fills out infinite again. As the watcher looks closer at the moving stream and flow, all life becomes discernible.

That's it, that's the dream. Why I love my brain for this: I've been struggling to read this fellow, Deluze, who writes about time as it is constructed in cinema & how this construction indicates changing historical philosophies. Really confusing stuff that I wander in and out of understanding. But it seems as if my subconscious is picking up on this and working out visualizations in order to examine my life...and the result has been some incredibly beautiful dreams putting emotions and thoughts to images that explain what it is I'm feeling better than I could have consciously explained it to myself.

That's why I'm admiring my brain today. Anyhow...