forget health! it's all about the wooshy feeeling...

wooshy = good.

Just load up on the advil and pray.
 

advil = check.
prayer = check (really embarassing, but true).

[p.s. she gave me a ride home--four blocks--today. i was too giddy to ask her up to my balcony, plus worried about the state of my dishes (atrocious).

also, what does one do when the person you really really like is far too cute for you, i mean, like really super cute to the point that you think about all the weight you've put on, your back being crap, the zits and sweat you're hauling along, etc etc. i.e. is it possible to date someone hotter than you?]
 

stop! You are cute!

I know it's hard but just don't think about it too much. You have a great personality and I don't mean that in the regular "great personality way...

go for it! I have to live vicariously through someone...
 

and not just a a great personality...
girl! come on. i would spot you from across the room, except that you'd be too busy looking away or down or around... damn. if i thought so, i know i am not ( nor was) the only one.
 

:)

i feel like i should be blushing now 'cause it seems like i was batting my eyelashes for some good, sweet esteem boosting. okay, i'm not too proud... i needed it.

she's coming over tomorrow. granted, with others from work, but i invited her and i got some good chatting in today. she picked out a flower for me to buy (i wanted that type, but she found the best one for me... she came over from her spot to help me out). plus i taped up her leaking potting soil bag (try to make that into something naughty).

everyone at work is teasing me, i'm that obvious, plus they're all gossip-hounds. it's a bit like being back in jr. high: Andy, the recent high-school graduate, flaming gay-emo smartie, wants to teach me how to swoon and sweep my hand down my neck a little more dramaticly when she's around me. Andrea, the catches-all-my-most-embarassing-moments girl, alternates being laughing at me and setting up gatherings and pointedly inviting us both. Jackie laughs constantly and asks me every five minutes what the scoop is. Annie, scrapper-kid, comes up, high-fives, leans in and says, "so..." like i'm supposed to know what that means.

all in all, i'm a little afraid that my personal and darling little crush has been co-opted and if it goes nowhere, everyone i've met in the last five months is going to be shaking their heads, back towards me.

wish i wasn't so obvious a blusher when i like someone, but i guess it has its advantages, like multiple people strategizing instead of me (bad love strategizer), and disadvantages, like jinxing the mojo.

hmmmmm.
 

i was going to say: ask her out. but it seems that's been covered.
so i say good luck, god speed and, erm, good gracious?
 

well, i haven't exactly asked her out, but i did ask her over to a gathering and that's a good place to step back into reality and see what's up, hopefully.

good gracious indeed.

and thanks for the luck.
 

I think I'm going to cry with all this love and support going on around here... makes me want to ask out someone out.....
 

yeaaaaaah.

go for it. find someone soon. then ask him out.

i'm on the countdown 'til the gathering. (dramatic sigh and arm to the brow, worthy of Andy's respect).

writing until then. cheers.
 

bugger me.

after a hopeful text message, she was a no show, etc.

i'm headin' outa town for the day tomorrow so's to not forget that life is something larger than my dramatic whatever.

or maybe everything's just a stooge. haha. ha.

wish that something, anyfuckingthing, would happen sometime, anytime.
 

No show doesn't neccessarily mean "no-go" with that woman...it may just mean that she couldn't make it for whatever reason.

But one thing is for sure, you're good enough, you're smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like you-lots of lovely people like YOU!

Don't fret too much woman, something will happen one way or another and likely, multiple things all at once.
 

yeah, yeah. somehow, "you're good enough, you're smart enough" makes me nervous. :)

i feel better now... retreating a little bit from wishes too big for their britches.

oh well.