n. infantile pattern of suckle-swallow movement in which the tongue is placed between incisor teeth or between alveolar ridges during initial stage of swallowing (if persistent can lead to various dental abnormalities) v. [content removed due to Bush campaign to clean up the internet] n. act of nyah-nyah v. pursuing with relentless abandon the need to masticate and thrust the world into every bodily incarnation in order to transform it, via the act of salivation, into nutritive agency

Thursday, December 16, 2010

more luminarius

luminarius in hibernation
This immature specimen of the Luminarius spectatorina was photographically recorded in 1963 by a Japanese tourist walking along the coast of Wales. She told authorities that it didn't move "until she kicked it" and then it curled around her so quickly "she lost her brain pebbles." When she came to, it was nowhere to be seen and she had small puncture wounds along the back of her knees. These were inspected at the local hospital by one Dr. Sneville, who called in the locally-renown psychozoologist Dr. Breton to take a second look.

Dr. Breton reputedly became very excited, although neither she nor the medical doctor could locate anything untoward about the puncture wounds, other than that there were seventy-three of them, measuring .5 mm in length and .23 mm in width, and every last one of them was located on the back of the knees only. Dr. Breton asked the Japanese tourist to stay in contact and notify her if anything further occured, which the tourist did. Unfortunately when Breton returned her call, the tourist had already succumbed to what her family reported as "pulsing lights inside her veins." Breton is still unclear what this means, though she has several theories.
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