Change is hard, no? I've been feeling sketchy about making such a big change as shifting locales - I've moved so damn much in my life that another move just seems like riding a donkey backwards. But I realized this year that I've never really settled into a place for the past two and a half years, and it was time for me to really feel comfortable somewhere. So I decided to move, and a friend moved out of another friend's place and I always felt so comfortable there, so I nabbed the deal and signed a lease, which was both exciting and scary as shit.

Now that I've come back from my wonderful visit back home, I have arrived at a new place and have a few days to settle into it alone before my new roommate (c2) comes back . At first I felt lonely - after all the bustle and runaround back home (and having a car to use, which felt made me feel like a Nascar Superstar). In the new digs, the radiators have been going haywire and pounding and rattling at night, which creeps me out a bit. I have lived alone for a few years of my life, and it takes quite a bit to freak me out, but pounding pipes give me heebie-jeebies. And then the things I didn't notice or didn't worry about: few electric outlets, little storage, construction outside, strange light and second-floor dirty windows... piled up.

But as quickly as these frets arrived, also came the realization that they don't matter - niggling worries are obstacles to adjust to, and I think they are just manifestations of my nervousness about settling into a new place. You know how when you are a little stressed, some details become more important than they really are? Because I still feel excited and comfortable in this apartment, and I think that with time, it will start to feel like my own as well as c2's.

The radiators are rather endearing - especially as they pump copious amounts of precious heat into my bones (enough that I'm wearing shorts to bed instead of layers of long-johns). And two balconys and a couch that I wrote for an hour on this morning, and plenty of place to be, and my fuzzy new slippers sliding over the wooden floors.

Just a time to breathe deep, listen to my new music, light a few candles and work on unpacking and feeling comfortable. I'll have to add a few pictures for folks...